What to say to reassure your anxious partner

• I’m so happy to see you, I’ve been thinking about you all day.

• I notice you’re feeling worried, I hope you know I’m here for you.

• Give me a cuddle, I’m going to miss you when I’m at work.

• have I told you recently how happy you make me? I feel so lucky to be with you!

• Don’t worry if you don’t hear much from me today. I’ll be in meetings all day.

• I hope you know I’m here for you, no matter how you’re feeling.

• You’re not too much; you’re exactly the right amount for me.

• I want you to feel how much I love you, so you’re never tempted to question it.

• Hey, just so you know, I’m not going anywhere.

• You are incredibly important to me.

Regular reassurance will help to calm down your anxiously attached partner's attachment system.

Their greatest fear is losing you, and this fear can get so intense it might lead to them behaving in sabotaging ways that push you away. Let them know how important they are to you; it helps them feel secure and keeps that fear at bay.

Reassurance keeps their attachment system from screaming as loudly, allowing them to trust the connection with you and feel safe. The more they can relax into that feeling, the closer they move towards secure attachment, and the more secure your relationship (and you!) can become.